What's wrong, (with) Margaret?

Margaret van wyk did nothing wrong

Although many comedians try, it doesn’t often happen that our country is unified in laughter…. This past week, Margaret van Wyk was a laughing matter all over South Africa and all at her own expense. We say, there was nothing wrong with her original intention.

Margaret inadvertently sent a close-up photo, of her vagina, to the Whatsapp group of her child’s school hockey club. It was meant for her husband. She could have claimed her phone hacked or stolen, but followed up her picture with “Sorry, it was meant for my husband” and then promptly asked: “Het Chris al gery?” (Has Chris driven off yet?). This photo and her identity was sent all over the country. For those who did not get to see the real photo, we were soon entertained by memes and jokes about it, all over social media.  

The Good:

For Margaret, taking an intimate photo and sending it to her hubby is a natural thing. It’s hers to share with him, and if she thought there was something wrong with it, she wouldn’t have taken the pic in the first place. Good on you, Margaret! You are proud of your womanhood, and you are keeping your marriage spicy and interesting (both, as it should be). As the parents of teenaged children and coming from a small community (which you have now put on the map), an active and adventurous sex life is to be commended.

I believe that most people admired Margaret’s ‘flirting’ with her husband, and the fact that she works at keeping the marriage bed warm. A good many men were envious of Chris. Well done, Margaret!

The Bad:

Margaret was shamed in public by a group of people she considered her friends. Someone in the hockey group, if not all, passed that photo on and identified the owner. We all laughed about it. We all shared the story. Many of the people talking about it, were shaming what Margaret did. She shared a photo of her private parts. Intending it for her husband. There is nothing wrong with what she did, but I am afraid that we have now scared every woman who was considering being adventurous back into hiding. After so many years of emancipating women, of removing stigmas and encouraging women to have confidence in their sexuality, there are whispers of “shameful” and “disgusting” going around. I believe the shame is on those who think this way.

The Ugly:

Margaret is not the first victim of modern technology. Too many break-ups have ended in photos or videos that were seen by people it was not intended for. Angry lovers or an ex-spouse who is being mean and spiteful have distributed personal, private moments to the public. We have all felt the loss of photographs being lost when a camera or phone broke, went missing or got stolen. None of us have any idea where those pictures ended up.

The whole idea and concept about being intimate and sharing it with your partner in love and on camera is the TRUST behind it. Margaret’s confidence in herself, and her trust in her ‘friends’ have been betrayed. Shame on us.

The only thing that Margaret was guilty of (apart from being a sexual being and a great wife), is not taking extra care when sending that ‘selfie’. Let it be a warning to all of us: be daring, be kinky, be adventurous – but take care whom you share it with and where you keep it. Once it is in pixels and online, you have NO control over who sees it and whom they share it with.